Lesbihonest

"Encore" by Cheryl Lynn

...your love's (your) / so good (good love) / deserve an encore (deserves an encore)...

...for this is my mother's hair, my grandmother's skin, my grandfather's stare, and Africa's kin...

This is day 3 of 'Oh Naturale' and I love it more.  I was semi-frustrated these past few days because it is coily!  It is difficult to comb, however, I can manage it.  If anything, it reminded and reiterated to my soul that I am locking my hair.  Obviously, she is not intended to comb as liberally as I did when it was permed.

My goodness, do I feel liberated.  That is as corny as a phrase can get but it ain't nothing but the truth.  There were so many demons in that hair.  It wasn't the hair itself, but it was the way people (men) responded to it, the way I acted because of it (due to some already existent inadequacies of spirit), the way superficial culture told us all to revere it.

It's making me feel like I need to cut of the rest of my unnatural self.  I need to eat, breath, sleep, love, fight, cry, dance, express natural...ly.  Although it is just hair (just protein filaments), arriving at a place where it is just hair, it is just a part of my body that needs care too translates to a broader intellectual revamping.  Bell Hooks said something to the effect that we (Black people especially) nourish ourselves with lies and are shocked, even upset, at the state of unauthenticity of our lives.  Girl...so, I need to eat some truth...all the time.  And the truth is, I am a growing African woman trying to be deep, not to impress anyone, but so as to be far removed from the heights of superficiality.

It is not that big of a deal.  With age, it is less of a big deal.  Nestled between the place progress has brought me and place hardwork will take me, I cannot be so ignorant.  I cannot be so brainwashed.  I gotta be happy.

The love I have for myself deserves an encore.