Love with a Fire Read, Part 1

Apologize - OneRepublic
...believe me when I say, I still love you...

The Zain is commonly known as angry Black. Ever since the debacle that was high school, I have adopted a racial awareness and sensitivity that has become apart of my identity.

And it is such an invasive awareness that it is terribly conspicuous part of how I think. You need not even know me that well to notice it and feel it.

But I have noticed, sluggishly, that people misunderstand and miscategorize my racial awareness and sensitivity.

I do not hate White people. I do find White culture to be a little annoying and weird, but not all the people subscribe to the culture and those who do, do so to varying degrees. So it would be inappropriate to say "I hate White people", although I have said that and do say that. But I don't mean no harm.

The problem for me lies in the institutions that White people are often the head of, so understandably my hatred seems to be for White people. But I love people. And most people love me. That is one of the earliest things people taught me about myself is that I am likeable. Given the right conversation and context of meeting, almost everyone likes me. If you happen to be someone who I called out and had to reprimand in the biting, ferocious way that I do, then not so much. You might hate me, which is fine. Hate on haters.

I define life as this very difficult and occasionally fulfilling (because it is not so fulfilling for me right now) process in which everyone needs a family to root for, support, care for, and love them. And I don't mean mommy & daddy & brother & uncle & aunty alone, although that is a great scenario too. So White or Black and male or female and child or grown, just wants a family, stability, food, and shelter.

I feel as though people in positions of power neglect that fact about humanity. They seem to be wholly ignorant to the fact that people suffer immeasurably and inexplicably all over the world; and often those ignoramuses are White.